As the zombie ghost of Rod Carew, who stood watch over us in the Right Field Nose Bleeds,  can attest to, the Stuck in Right Field event yesterday was, at least in one respect, a complete bust. The Twins were demolished, in a real test of fan fortitude, by the visiting Tribe, 10 to 1. It was depressing, to say the least (as you can see from the doleful gaze St. Rod is casting upon the assembled).

Still, the fabulous artists who were Stuck in Right Field, for the most part stuck out the entire nine-inning affair, and we reveled much in the full camaraderie and artistic bonhomie that ruled over the evening.

If you missed the Stuck in Right Field event, well, so much the pity. I am terribly sorry for you.

But lest you despair too much, keep in mind that there is always hope — the regular Art Happy Hour takes place in just a few short days at the fabulous Bedlam Theatre.

What: Art Happy Hour, a chance for artists to mingle, share business cards and good high spirits, and exchange information and provide mutual support

When: Wednesday, June 10, 4 to 7 pm

Where: Bedlam Theatre

Who knows what marvels may span the course of a week?

For our resident artiste adopté, Joe Mauer, the past week was filled with marvels of a most extraordinary nature. Yesterday, it was announced that Minnesota Twins catcher Joe Mauer was being named the American League Player of the Week presented by Bank of America for the period ending Sunday, May 24.

In seven games last week, Joe Mauer went 11-24 (a .458 batting average) with two doubles, four home runs, 25 total bases, 12 runs scored, and 13 RBI . Joe was overall, as of Tuesday, batting .444, and had 11 HR, 31 RBI, a 1.042 slugging percentage, and a .516 on-base percentage. In particular, on May 21, Mauer went 3-for-4 with two doubles and a grand slam, accumulating a career-high six RBI, and leading the Twins to a 20-1 victory over the A.L. Central rival Chicago White Sox.

Today also marks the beginning of the last week before the “Stuck in Right Field” event that takes place at the Metrodome on June 3. And considering Joe Mauer’s marvellous past week, we may well all know no end of marvellous glory as we count down the days until we meet in the fabulous Nose Bleeds, tossing down abuse on the visiting rivals, lavishing praise on our own hometown boys, and stuffing our hotdog-holes with all the Hormel dollar dogs we can lay hands on.

Here are “Stuck in Right Field” event details:

What: We will meet up to watch your Minnesota Twins take on those hard striving, underachieving kids from Cleveland (boo!) at the Metrodome.

When: Wednesday, June 3. Gametime, 7:10 pm.

How: Artsy sorts are asked meet up at the main Twins Ticket Office — near Gate G — no later than 6:20 pm. (!!!!!) (Be there on time, or miss your chance to sit with the gang!) Look for a slightly pudgy guy in a blue home  Twins jersey and black beret (that’ll be Mr. Art Happy Hour, Michael Fallon).

Everyone will pitch in to buy general admission tickets for themselves (for cheap! — only $8), and it will be Marvellous.

Note: Facebookers can sign up for this event (and get more details), here.

Young up-and-comer who really paints the “wall,” Joe Mauer

Stuck in Right Field

By Special Art Happy Field Correspondent, Andy Sturdevant

Dateline: Minneapolis

A bad night at the Metrodome can be so much like a bad night at a gallery opening.

It’s a beautiful evening and you suspect you should be out enjoying it, but you are instead trapped indoors, trapped inside a crowded, noisy sterile white building drinking overpriced beer and watching strutting, arrogant local “professionals” bumble through another lackluster showing, constantly being outdone by their counterparts in New York and Los Angeles; meanwhile, scowling men dressed in dark clothing hover over the action, calling out errors and loudly announcing to all that can hear who’s in and who’s out. A drunken malcontent is telling you “My kid’s twice as good as these bums and he’s just in kindergarten!” You cringe at the thought of what you’ll read in the papers the next day about this dismal performance. How can your local heroes be so well-intentioned and so spirited, and yet so completely incompetent and so seemingly ignorant of the fundamentals?

But on a good night — and there are many of them! — it all comes together beautifully. There’s careful attention to craft, there’s passion and high spiritedness, there’s guts and high-wire risks that would seem impossible to pull off, but that pay off in thrilling ways. You’re constantly amazed that these kids, some of them just out of college or called up from the sticks, are so good at what they do. “These young kids have a future!” you exclaim. “What a great eye! What marvelous control!” It makes you proud to live in Minnesota!

On that note, join mnartists.org and Art Happy Hour at “Stuck in Right Field” — a celebration of art and baseball and whatever intersections there may be between the two.

What: We will meet up to watch your Minnesota Twins take on those hard striving, underachieving kids from Cleveland (boo!) at the Metrodome.

When: Wednesday, June 3. Gametime, 7:10 pm.

How: Artsy sorts are asked meet up at the main Twins Ticket Office — near Gate G — no later than 6:20 pm. (!!!!!) (Be there on time, or miss your chance to sit with the gang!) Everyone will pitch in to buy general admission tickets for themselves (for cheap! — only $8), and we will all enjoy Hormel Dollar Dog night together. And out in the fabulous Right Field Nose Bleeds!

As that experimental atonal Fluxus-inspired art-rock anthem goes, “We’re going to win Twins, give it our all / We’ve got the guys who’ll knock the cover off the ball.”

Ooh la la!